Babies don't keep (part 1)

 There have been a lot of people crossing my path lately reminding me to enjoy these days with my girls while they are still little.  I have to admit there are times when I find myself grumbling and complaining about all the time and energy it takes to raise babies.  (especially while they are little when they need so much help with everything!)  I took this as a sign/gift God telling me to slow down and chill out and enjoy these moments with the children He blessed me with.   I can't tell you how grateful I am for the voice of the Lord whispering in my ear and reminding me of this.  So from now on I am going to muster up all the strength and joy I have in me and just live each day to it's fullest and truly have fun with my two favorite girls!!  

I want to share a little of my story as a stay at home mommy and what it's meant to me.  By no means is this a post boasting about me and how all my choices are the right ones.  I am not walking in your shoes nor do I know the different situations you are facing in your life.  

Before I ever had children I always knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom.  Three years ago when I had my first daughter my husband and I were still very much newly married.  I was working a full time job as an office manager and my husband was a full time student and full time employee.  I guess I felt like since we were still working on "us" that I decided after almost 3 months of maternity leave I would go back to work.  We managed to work it out that our daughter would only be at daycare for half days and not everyday.  I will admit I cried weeks before I went back to work just knowing that I was going to miss out on some of the smallest and biggest parts of her growing up.  After a little over 3 months of being back to work I was unexpectedly laid off.  At first I was devastated and thought how were we ever going to make it financially and I had better start looking for another job ASAP!  I remember those days after being unemployed while I was holding my daughter as she slept I heard God tell me that He took that job away from me because He wanted me to stay home and raise my daughter.  Because I tend to be stubborn, I argued with Him and questioned Him how we could make it work financially.  Finally I surrendered to God and sat down with my husband and shared with him what I felt God was telling me.  I am so blessed to have a husband who supports and WANTS me to be a stay at home mom.  He never seemed to question or worry how it will all work out.  (he doesn't have trust issues like me!)  When my oldest daughter was 9 months old we found out we were pregnant again.  I found myself freaking out again but eventually completely convinced that this was my season the Lord was giving me to raise my babies and there was absolutely no question that I would continue to stay home.  

Over the last 3 years the Lord has shown me His hand on our lives and how He has provided for our family.  I am not gonna lie.  There have been many, many tough days, weeks and months of questioning God and doubt.  I still have days that are hard (but seriously who doesn't right?).  I can tell you that there is perfect peace knowing that I"m doing what God called me to do right now during this season of my life.  And when I have a bad day I am quickly comforted and reminded of what I am doing is in His will.  

I need to get some cleaning done before my little bears get home from the Y.  (their daddy time)  I want to continue sharing more of this journey with you as the days go by.  I hope that my story is a blessing a help to even just one worn out/ burned out stay at home mommy.  I pray for a peace to come over you in knowing that the Lord is pleased with your choice to stay home with your children.  Have a blessed weekend and give your babies extra kisses!

xox,

Jill